"Should" is a dirty little word

client experience musings Nov 06, 2019
A small pile of brightly coloured post-it notes. The top post-it note reads

If you have ever felt the pressure of the things you “should” be doing, and the sense of dismay and failure that you aren’t quite keeping on top of things, then this is the post for you.

I hate the word “should”. It makes me stick my chin out and dig my heels in - nothing will bring out my stubborn streak faster than someone telling me I *should* do something. You should watch this movie, you should try this restaurant, you should eat this to lose weight, you should exercise more, you should apply for a new job, you should get a better partner - as women, we are bombarded with shoulds. It seems we are getting further from our own intuition with every year that passes and losing touch with what we truly enjoy.

Should is a word I never, ever use with my clients. There is no bullying or cajoling to let things go - no pressure to organise belongings in a certain way. Of course I challenge them, with questions like “When did you last use this?” and “What do you use this for?” But if my clients love and want to keep something, no matter how weird and wonderful, then that’s no skin off my nose. I simply figure out the best way for them to keep that item in their homes, and focus our energies on the items that they do want to let go of.

I see my role as coach, facilitator, sounding board and confidante and I serve my clients with equal parts muscle and heart. I listen to their stories and am always honoured that treasured memories and family histories are shared with me. With this heart-lead approach, the time flies by and my clients are always a bit surprised at how painless the process was. No tears; just relief and delight at the new found physical and emotional space now available.

If you feel like decluttering is something you “should” do, then I gently suggest that perhaps now isn’t the right time for you. While it is a fun and purging experience when you’re ready to do it, trying to declutter when your heart isn’t in it will be exhausting work. So check in with yourself - if you want to, and if you’re ready, book your free discovery call today so we can kick off your decluttering journey. And leave your shoulds at the door!!

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